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    A Few Life Changes After (Almost) Quitting Alcohol

    by Dewan Gibson January 24, 2019
    written by Dewan Gibson
    Michael Jackson drinking liquor with two little women sitting on his lap

    I didn’t start drinking until I was 21. Unfortunately I made up for lost time in the 18 years that followed. Until recently, I drank every night. Usually a couple-few glasses of wine while watching Netflix, maybe liquor on occasion—mixed with whatever juice the kids were drinking. And of course, having lived in two craft beer capitals—San Diego and Columbus—I drank a lot of beer. Much of it tasty, though a fair portion of it of the “Y’all trying to be too fancy and putting anything in this beer” variety.

    After recently catching a respiratory infection/chest ebola that was spreading throughout Ohio, I cut my alcohol intake by about 80 percent. I probably should have abstained completely, but I prefer at least a little vice in my life, apparently through sickness and in health.

    One of the changes since (almost) quitting alcohol has been in my attitude at work. Of course I still fantasize and save like crazy for an early retirement, but when summoned to meetings-about-meetings I no longer sigh and think “You can have my body but not my mind!” I’ve also been going without my normal mid-workday nap. During my professional career, which has unfortunately coincided with my drinking career, I’ve had sporadic energy. Mornings: Man, it’s too early to work. Afternoons: I’ll get right to it…after my power nap! Late afternoon: Working till 5 seems inhumane. Now during working hours I’m as chipper as a Chik-fil-A employee.

    Another big change since I’ve almost stopped drinking is…well, let me say this first. Healthy men have erections while sleeping. Such erections tend to occur while one is in deep REM sleep. Alcohol blocks REM sleep. So in short, alcohol blocks sleep boners. I figured my sleep boners had decreased due to co-sleeping with our kids, as if my body had an auto-shutoff feature to avoid weird situations. (“Mama, why does Dada have three legs at night?” Well, maybe two legs and a baby finger.) But it was the alcohol the whole time. Now I tell my wife, “If I’m sleep and it’s up, just take the kids back upstairs and hop right on!” No such thing as #HimToo in this house!

    Lastly, cutting down on alcohol has made me a better father. In recent years, I could only stand to be told by my kids to look at something three consecutive times—“Look! Look Dada! LOOK!”—before responding with an “I SEE!” heard throughout the neighborhood. Now even if I’m occupied with something important, like arguing about LeBron’s greatness on a text message thread, I pay them more attention. Of course they just want me to watch my oldest son make a fart sound with his sweaty armpit, but hey, it’s the little things they’ll remember when deciding if I get the bedroom or the basement when I’m elderly and forced to live with them.

    Overall, I’m happy with the changes since I’ve (almost) stopped drinking. Now that I’m more alert it turns out the world’s a fairly good place full of good humans, though I still can’t stand people who say “per se.” Anyhow, I’ll see how semi-sobriety goes for awhile, provided I don’t end up substituting alcohol with “Devil’s lettuce” now that medicinal marijuana’s legal in Ohio.

    -Dewan Gibson 

    January 24, 2019
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  • Buying Another Car From Hertz Car Sales

    by Dewan Gibson January 8, 2019
    by Dewan Gibson January 8, 2019

    Update, June 2020 I bought another automobile from Hertz Car Sales, this time a jazz blue 2019 Chrysler Pacifica minivan/bus for the kids to ruin in comfort. Due to media…

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  • It’s Worth Going To Art Basel, Even If You ‘Ain’t Go No Money For No Million Dollar Painting’

    by Dewan Gibson December 10, 2018
    by Dewan Gibson December 10, 2018

    Art Basel Miami first came to my attention when Diddy went down there to hit on barely legals and purchase a painting for $20 million. Coincidentally, this was around the…

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  • The Long-Term Effects Of Being A Stay-At-Home Dad

    by Dewan Gibson December 6, 2018
    by Dewan Gibson December 6, 2018

    My wife and I accidentally created three good looking human beings. To atone for bringing them into this harsh world, which appears to be on the downside of its 4.5…

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  • Some Of The Things To See At The World’s Largest Children’s Museum (In Indianapolis Of All Places)

    by Dewan Gibson November 25, 2018
    by Dewan Gibson November 25, 2018

    At close to 500,000 square feet, the Children’s Museum of Indianapolis is the world’s largest of its kind. It may also be the most expensive. The cost of admission varies…

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  • Exploring New Orleans A Bit Off-The-Beaten (Bourbon Street) Path

    by Dewan Gibson November 6, 2018
    by Dewan Gibson November 6, 2018

    I visited New Orleans for the first time five years ago and immediately knew Bourbon Street was not for me. Perhaps watching hours of Girls Gone Wild infomercials had ruined…

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  • Baja Beach Festival 2018: Lots Of Latin Trap And Tacos But Very Little Clothing

    by Dewan Gibson October 24, 2018
    by Dewan Gibson October 24, 2018

    My ageless friends in Southern California summoned me to Rosarito, Mexico for the inaugural Baja Beach Festival, a celebration of reggaeton and Latin trap. If you’re not familiar with the…

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  • A Master Plan To Not Pay For My Kids’ College Educations (At Least Not With My Own Money)

    by Dewan Gibson October 12, 2018
    by Dewan Gibson October 12, 2018

    Student loans are Satan’s work backed by the federal government. According to Forbes, Americans owe more than $1.5 trillion in student loan debt, which is nearly equal to the entire…

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  • A Nosebleed Seat View Of The Cleveland Browns’ September Super Bowl

    by Dewan Gibson September 23, 2018
    by Dewan Gibson September 23, 2018

    As of the start of this season the Cleveland Browns had won one game in the past two years. Having not won anything myself besides a kindergarten Monopoly tournament, I…

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  • A Quick Family Trip To See Barack Obama In Cleveland

    by Dewan Gibson September 15, 2018
    by Dewan Gibson September 15, 2018

    Shortly after Barack Obama left the Choom Gang and became a U.S. senator, I saw him speak against the Iraq War during a session of Congress. The tens of us…

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  • Parents: Don’t Be Guilted Into Getting A Family Dog

    by Dewan Gibson September 12, 2018
    by Dewan Gibson September 12, 2018

    I’d like our family dog if she was dumb and not just hard-headed. Just the other day she darted across the street to sniff the mail truck’s front tire. I…

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Happy New Year from them damn Gibsons. https://t.co/GM6hk9eyMa

01-Jan-2021

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I'm not 100% financially independent yet, but it feels good to buy the big shrimp w/o worry. 🙏🏾

31-Dec-2020

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When the kids keep bugging you to play football with their lil' friends. https://t.co/lyaLXMGwBq

22-Dec-2020

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Stopped at Whole Foods. The only other Black ppl there were paid shoppers. The gig economy is ugly.

21-Dec-2020

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Tom Cruise for Secretary of Social Distancing. That was impressive. #Message

17-Dec-2020

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