Parenting

A couple-few years ago, I wrote a blog post about my parents’ wedding at McDonald’s. The story went viral and McDonald’s contacted us about being part of a print ad, …

My 7-year-old, all grin but no front teeth, had an important question. “Mama, did you do sex?”  Where’d that come from? Well, we “did” sex often and our little ones …

It’s been a little over three years since we visited an upselling-obsessed professional photographer named JCPenney for family pictures. This year we leveled up and hired a personal photographer at …

I wrote an article for Scary Mommy a few years back that discussed how my tribe of Lightskins are free to choose their own racial identity. The piece went semi-viral …

Recent weather has Ohio feeling like Iceland, though without the stunning scenery and far fewer kind, curious white folks. I’ve been looking for a temporary escape. Florida sounded nice. But …

My wife and I accidentally created three good looking human beings. To atone for bringing them into this harsh world, which appears to be on the downside of its 4.5 …

At close to 500,000 square feet, the Children’s Museum of Indianapolis is the world’s largest of its kind. It may also be the most expensive. The cost of admission varies …

I’d like our family dog if she was dumb and not just hard-headed. Just the other day she darted across the street to sniff the mail truck’s front tire. I …

My 7-year-old has the strength and agility of a gymnast and a good-sized cranium. Assuming I don’t get a substantial increase in dad-strength within the next few years, he’ll be …

My mom once cut out a picture of Babyface and had me show it to my barber. She thought his style–flat on the sides, juice-infused curls on the top—would look …

Kidz Bop is a group of child singers who perform clean versions of today’s hit songs, thereby preventing their target audience from singing along to N-bombs and other filthy lyrics …

The common belief is that summer vacation from school originated from America’s agricultural past. Children needed to be home to toil the land, or to at least watch black people …

The first time my now-wife came to my old apartment she was startled by my minimalism. I had a couch and some fig newtons. A few months later, she caught …

Years ago I became friends with a neighbor named Walid who had recently moved to San Diego from Saudi Arabia. We drank beer, smoked hookah, talked about women, discussed social …

My 6-year-old lay on the kitchen floor, refusing dinner and screaming that his stomach hurt. I thought Nile was being dramatic, which he does after a long day of being …

When asked if Amber and I will have a fourth child, my typical response has been, “Doubt it. Not unless God and the IUD surprise us!” But recently she’s had …

Here are some of my feelings about surviving Christmas as a parent: 1) Kids should be told that Santa’s fake, and that his round belly, indicative of low testosterone and …

In kindergarten I won the Monopoly tournament and temporarily overcame a stutter to have a brief speaking role in the class play. But if you ask my mom, she’s most …

My first real basketball game was in the seventh grade. I played for the Wiley Middle School Warriors. Well, kind of. I was actually on the C-team. It was the …

It’s almost noon. My two youngest boys have just returned home from preschool, where they were quiet and well-behaved. But now they’re back in their comfort zone. They quickly resort …